1. Watch the sunset together.
2. Take showers together.
3. Back rubs/massages.
4. Listen to classical music and cuddle in the dark or w/ blacklight. ♫
5. French Kiss. :P
6. Hold her w/ hands inside the back of her shirt.
7. Whisper to each other.
8. Cook for each other.
9. Skinny dip.
10. Make out in the rain.
11. Dress each other.
12. Undress each other.
13. Kiss every part of their body.
14. Hold hands.
15. Sleep together. (Actually sleep with each other, not sex)
16. One word: Foreplay.
17. Sit and talk in just underwear.
18. Buy gifts for each other.
19. Roses.
20. Find out their favorite cologne/perfume and wear it every time you're together.
21. Wear his clothes.
22. Find a nice secluded place to lie and watch the stars.
23. Incense/candles/oils/blacklights and music make for great cuddling/sex.
24. Kiss at every chance you get.
25. Don't wear underwear and let them find out.
26. Kinky is bad; Blindfolds are good.
27. Lightly kiss their collarbone and their jawbone just below the ear, then whisper I love you.
28. Bubble baths.
29. Go for a long walk down the beach at midnight.
30. Make love.
31. Write poetry for each other.
32. Kiss/smell her hair.
33. Hugs are the universal medicine.
34. Say I love you, only when you mean it and make sure they know you mean it.
35. Give random gifts of flowers/candy/poetry etc.
36. Tell her that she's the only girl you ever want. Don't lie.
37. Spend every second possible together.
38. Tell her that she doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to. And mean it.
39. Look into each other's eyes.
40. Very lightly push up her chin, look into her eyes, tell her you love her, and kiss her lightly.
41. Talk to each other using only body language and your eyes.
42. When in public, only flirt w/ each other.
43. Walk behind her and put your hands in her front pockets.
44. Put love notes in their pockets when they aren't looking.
45. Clothes are no fun.
46. Buy her a ring.
47. Keep one of her bras somewhere where you see it everyday.
48. Sing to each other.
49. Read to each other.
50. PDA = Public Display of Affection.
51. Take advantage of any time alone together.
52. Tell her about how you answered every question in math with her name
53. Draw. (If you can)
54. Let her sit on your lap.
55. Go hiking and camp out together in the woods or on a mountain.
56. Lips were made for kissing. So were eyes, and fingers, and cheeks, and collarbones, and hands, and ears.
57. Kiss her stomach.
58. Always hold her around her hips/sides.
59. Guys like half-shirts.
60. Take her to dinner and do the dinner for two deal.
61. Spaghetti (Ever see Lady and the Tramp?)
62. Hold her hand, stare into her eyes, kiss her hand and then put it over your heart.
63. Unless you can feel their hear beating, you aren't close enough.
64. Dance together.
65. Sit in front of a roaring fire and make out/make love.
66. I love the way a girl looks right after she's fallen asleep with her head in my lap.
67. Carry her to bed.
68. Waterbeds are fun.
69. You figure it out.
70. Do cute things like write I love you in a note so that they have to look in a mirror to read it.
71. Break every one of your parent's relationship rules for them.
72. Make excuses to call them every 5 minutes
73. Even if you are really busy doing something, go out of your way to call and say I love you.
74. Call from your vacation spot to tell them you were thinking about them.
75. Remember your dreams and tell her about them.
76. Ride your bike 8 miles just to see them for a few hours.
77. Ride home and call them.
78. Tell each other your most sacred secrets/fears.
79. Somehow incorporate them into any kind of religion or worship you have.
80. Be Prince Charming to her parents. (Brownie Points)
81. Act out mutual fantasies together. (Not necessarily sexual)
82. Brush her hair out of her face for her.
83. Stay up all night to think of 101 ways to be sweet to them.
84. Hang out with his/her friends. (more brownie points)
85. Go to church/pray/worship together.
86. Take her to see a romantic movie and remember the parts she liked.
87. Cuddle together under a full moon on a clear night.
88. Learn from each other and don't make the same mistake twice.
89. Everyone deserves a second chance.
90. Describe the joy you feel just to be with him/her.
91. Make sacrifices for each other.
92. Really love each other, or don't stay together.
93. Write a fictional story about how you met/fell in love, etc. and give
it to them.
94. Let there never be a second during any given day that you aren't thinking about them, and make sure they know it.
95. Love yourself before you love anyone else.
96. Buy her a charm bracelet/necklace w/her name on it.
97. Dedicate songs to them on the radio.
98. Fall asleep on the phone with each other.
99. Sleep naked together.
100. Stand up for them when someone talks trash.
101. Never forget the kiss goodnight. And always remember to say, "Sweet dreams."
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
Let's celebrate Mother's Day!
Just to give you a background, in 1912, Anna Jarvis trademarked the phrases "second Sunday in May" and "Mother's Day", and created the Mother's Day International Association. This is from Wikipedia. And until now, the said day is celebrated annually to give thanks to our Mothers.
I will give you some tips on how to give thanks and celebrate Mother's day:
a. Giving flowers is the most common way to celebrate it. Try to give flowers with a twist. Try to buy 8 to 12 rose/any kinds of flowers. And place it in different parts of your house. And in each flower you could put a short note on how you value your Mother or how much you love her. And the moment she gets all the flowers you could give her a big kiss and hug. Isn't that sweet? Try also putting rose petals on the floor where she will walk on before getting the flowers.
b. Bake a cake. Personally bake cakes are much more special than buying pre-made cakes.
c. Treat her to a romantic dinner. Order all her favorite food. A suggestion would be Italian or Asian fine dining.
d. Spend the whole night watching DVD or movies at home. With popcorn or any food you like. Simple yet memorable.
e. Make a scrapbook. Put all your memories together. Everything. Everything which has a sentimental value both for you and your mom. Im sure that can make her cry.
f. Lastly, just spend the whole day with her. We dont usually have that time to spend with her because of different reasons. So this is the best day to spend it with her. Talk to her and open up to her. In that case, she will know your current situation or desires. Plus that could be your chance to make her feel you love her.
Some people may disagree about these suggestions. You can try other ways to do it. Just remember the most important thing you need to do that day is To make your Mother feel your love and how much you value her.
TIP BITS
DID YOU KNOW?!
That in Arab World, Mother's Day in most of Arab countries is celebrated on March 21. Egypt is the first country to celebrate this day.
Monday, May 3, 2010
TATSULOK: Tatlong sulok ng Pag ibig
Kabanata IX
Ang natatanging PAGBABAGO.
Asawa ng Narator: Dahil sa nagbabagong panahon. At dahil sa global warming, soil erosion, melting of the ice caps, polar shift at ang pinaka inaabangan na Mayan Prophecy sa 2012 ay napilitang makipaghiwalay si GIRL kay Guy. Speaking of Girl. Nais kong ipaalam sa inyo kung paano siya nabuhay. Bakit? Wala lang. Sayang naman tong kabanatang ito e. Diba?
MAMA MUTZ: ( Manganganak na...) ARAAAAY! LUIS. LUIS. Dalhin mo ako sa garden natin. Dun ko gusto manganak. Para one with nature.
LUIS: ( pang walong asawa ng nanay ni Girl) Wala tayong garden *GOYA ko. ( *Goya ang term of endearment nilang dalawa ) Diba nga kabukas mo ng pinto eh High Way na?
MAMA MUTZ: Ayy oo nga pala. Dalhin mo ako sa Garden ng Kapitbahay. Yung may bastos na Angel na umiihi. Dun ako manganganak.
Apo ng Narator: Nag CR lang si Lola ko. Ako muna daw ang mag magsalita. So ayun na nga. Dun pinanganak si GIRL. At since sa Garden siya pinanganak. GARDENIA ang name niya. Kahit walang palaman. In english, even if theres no FLESH around?! Tama!
MAMA MUTZ: Anak. Pinapangako ko sa Angel na Umiihi nato na magiging sikat ka. Pag aagawan ka ng mga lalaki. At yan ang pagbabago na gusto ko mangyari sayo dahil dati... Oo pinag aagawan ako. Kaso mga babae umaagaw sakin. Mukha daw akong lalaki. Babaeng mukhang lalaki. Kaya anak. ikaw ang PAGBABAGO!
LUIS: Goya ko, tama ka. Ikaw anak ang magpapatuloy ng lahi natin. Lahi ng mararangal at matatapang.
Katulong ng Narator: Kumain lang si Sir. Ako muna daw mag take over. At biglang may dumaan na isang ipis. Gumapang sa paa ni Luis. At...
LUIS: WAAAAAAAGGG!!! AHHHHH! ALLERGY AKO. ALLERGY AKO!!!
MAMA MUTZ: GAGO! ALLERGIC!
LUIS: Ayy. Wait. ALLERGIC AKO SA IPISSSSS! WAHHHHHHHH! Uhhh!
Katulong ng Narator: Tama ang hinala mo. Hindi siya ginahasa ng ipis wag kang epal. Allergic siya sa ipis ayun. Namatay siya. At mula noon si MAMA MUTZ at Gardenia ( Kahit Walang Palaman! ) ang nabuhay ng masaya. Ano kaya ang susunod na mangyayari? Ano ang... iluluto ko na almusal bukas? Any suggestion?! Abangan...
ITUTULOY...
Ang natatanging PAGBABAGO.
Asawa ng Narator: Dahil sa nagbabagong panahon. At dahil sa global warming, soil erosion, melting of the ice caps, polar shift at ang pinaka inaabangan na Mayan Prophecy sa 2012 ay napilitang makipaghiwalay si GIRL kay Guy. Speaking of Girl. Nais kong ipaalam sa inyo kung paano siya nabuhay. Bakit? Wala lang. Sayang naman tong kabanatang ito e. Diba?
MAMA MUTZ: ( Manganganak na...) ARAAAAY! LUIS. LUIS. Dalhin mo ako sa garden natin. Dun ko gusto manganak. Para one with nature.
LUIS: ( pang walong asawa ng nanay ni Girl) Wala tayong garden *GOYA ko. ( *Goya ang term of endearment nilang dalawa ) Diba nga kabukas mo ng pinto eh High Way na?
MAMA MUTZ: Ayy oo nga pala. Dalhin mo ako sa Garden ng Kapitbahay. Yung may bastos na Angel na umiihi. Dun ako manganganak.
Apo ng Narator: Nag CR lang si Lola ko. Ako muna daw ang mag magsalita. So ayun na nga. Dun pinanganak si GIRL. At since sa Garden siya pinanganak. GARDENIA ang name niya. Kahit walang palaman. In english, even if theres no FLESH around?! Tama!
MAMA MUTZ: Anak. Pinapangako ko sa Angel na Umiihi nato na magiging sikat ka. Pag aagawan ka ng mga lalaki. At yan ang pagbabago na gusto ko mangyari sayo dahil dati... Oo pinag aagawan ako. Kaso mga babae umaagaw sakin. Mukha daw akong lalaki. Babaeng mukhang lalaki. Kaya anak. ikaw ang PAGBABAGO!
LUIS: Goya ko, tama ka. Ikaw anak ang magpapatuloy ng lahi natin. Lahi ng mararangal at matatapang.
Katulong ng Narator: Kumain lang si Sir. Ako muna daw mag take over. At biglang may dumaan na isang ipis. Gumapang sa paa ni Luis. At...
LUIS: WAAAAAAAGGG!!! AHHHHH! ALLERGY AKO. ALLERGY AKO!!!
MAMA MUTZ: GAGO! ALLERGIC!
LUIS: Ayy. Wait. ALLERGIC AKO SA IPISSSSS! WAHHHHHHHH! Uhhh!
Katulong ng Narator: Tama ang hinala mo. Hindi siya ginahasa ng ipis wag kang epal. Allergic siya sa ipis ayun. Namatay siya. At mula noon si MAMA MUTZ at Gardenia ( Kahit Walang Palaman! ) ang nabuhay ng masaya. Ano kaya ang susunod na mangyayari? Ano ang... iluluto ko na almusal bukas? Any suggestion?! Abangan...
ITUTULOY...
TATSULOK: Tatlong sulok ng Pag ibig.
KABANATA IX
Ang pumapagaspas na hiwalayan...
Apo ng Narator: Dahil sa di inaasahang hiwalayan ng mag kasintahan ay binabati ko ng maligayang kaarawan ang aming aso na si Bantay. Bantay happy birthday. Going back to the story. Nagpunta si Guy kay Girl para makipag usap.
GIRL: So, madalas ka pala sa Kabet mo huh?
GUY: Hindi. Minsan lang.
GIRL: Once, twice, thrice—gaano ba kadalas ang minsan?
GUY: 4 times lang. Sorry na. Di na ako manloloko.
GIRL: Tandaan mo. You can fool me once, you can fool me twice but you can never fool me THREE! Tandaan mo yan.
GUY: Wala namang masama na nakikipagkita ako sa kanya diba?
GIRL: Akala mo lang wala... pero meron! Meron! Meron!
GUY: Sorry na please. Sorry na. SORRY NA! ANAK NG TOKWA NAMAN OH!
GIRL: Simple lang naman ang hinihingi ko. Kung hindi mo ako marespeto bilang asawa, respetuhin mo naman ako bilang kaibigan. Kung hindi naman, respetuhin mo ako bilang tao.
GUY: I respect you more than I respect myself. I treat you as my wife.
GIRL: I was never your partner. I'm just your wife. kaya hindi mo ko nirerespeto! Go away. I dont need a parasite...
GUY: (duguan ang puso. labas mata. labas sipon. tulo laway. pati mucous membrane labas lahat..)
Apo ng Narator: Kawawa naman si Guy. Ano kaya ang mangyayari sa kabanatang ito? Ano kaya ang mangyayari sa mga housemates sa bahay ni kuya? Magkakaroon ba ng malinis na eleksyon sa May 10, 2010? Sasabog na ba ang Mt. Apo? Mabubuhay ba ulit si Hitler? Abangan...
ITUTULOY...
Ang pumapagaspas na hiwalayan...
Apo ng Narator: Dahil sa di inaasahang hiwalayan ng mag kasintahan ay binabati ko ng maligayang kaarawan ang aming aso na si Bantay. Bantay happy birthday. Going back to the story. Nagpunta si Guy kay Girl para makipag usap.
GIRL: So, madalas ka pala sa Kabet mo huh?
GUY: Hindi. Minsan lang.
GIRL: Once, twice, thrice—gaano ba kadalas ang minsan?
GUY: 4 times lang. Sorry na. Di na ako manloloko.
GIRL: Tandaan mo. You can fool me once, you can fool me twice but you can never fool me THREE! Tandaan mo yan.
GUY: Wala namang masama na nakikipagkita ako sa kanya diba?
GIRL: Akala mo lang wala... pero meron! Meron! Meron!
GUY: Sorry na please. Sorry na. SORRY NA! ANAK NG TOKWA NAMAN OH!
GIRL: Simple lang naman ang hinihingi ko. Kung hindi mo ako marespeto bilang asawa, respetuhin mo naman ako bilang kaibigan. Kung hindi naman, respetuhin mo ako bilang tao.
GUY: I respect you more than I respect myself. I treat you as my wife.
GIRL: I was never your partner. I'm just your wife. kaya hindi mo ko nirerespeto! Go away. I dont need a parasite...
GUY: (duguan ang puso. labas mata. labas sipon. tulo laway. pati mucous membrane labas lahat..)
Apo ng Narator: Kawawa naman si Guy. Ano kaya ang mangyayari sa kabanatang ito? Ano kaya ang mangyayari sa mga housemates sa bahay ni kuya? Magkakaroon ba ng malinis na eleksyon sa May 10, 2010? Sasabog na ba ang Mt. Apo? Mabubuhay ba ulit si Hitler? Abangan...
ITUTULOY...
TATSULOK: Tatlong sulok ng Pag ibig.
KABANATA VIII
MUDRA KNOWS BEST...
Kapatid ng Lolo ng Narator: Bago ko ituloy ang kwento... Binabati ko ang mga kamag anak ko diyan sa Pagudpod. And to all KFC subscribers... Eto na, dahil sa pagtatalong naganap kay GIRL at kay KABET... Umuwi si Kabet sa nanay niya. Si Matutina Luisita y Marcelo AKA MAMA MUTZ.
MAMA: Anak, oh napasugod ka?
KABET: Mah! I need your help. May ipapabarang ako.
MAMA: Anak, pasensya kana. Walang bisa ang barang ngayon. Martes. Dapat pumunta ka Biyernes o Lunes. Para long weekend.
KABET: Di ba pede... Isipin nalang natin biyernes ngayon? O lunes?
MAMA: Hindi anak. Sorry. Atsaka magkikita kami ngayon ni Brando. Mamasahiin ko sya.
KABET: Ma, Ang mga tala--mataas, mahirap maabot. Pero ipinapangako ko, Inay, bukas, luluhod ang mga tala!
MAMA: Anong connect nun kay Brando?!
KABET: Ma, broken hearted ako. Help me. Please.
MAMA: Anak, Para kang karinderyang bukas sa lahat ng gustong kumain. Dapat you learn how to close your door. Mahal na ang bayad sa kuryente anak, lalo pag 24/7.
KABET: Ma, Ayoko ng tinatapakan ako. Ayoko ng masikip, ayoko ng mabaho, ayoko ng walang tubig, ayoko ng walang pagkain, ayoko ng putik!
MAMA: Anak, learn to move on. May kutsilyo ako dyan sa cabinet. Yan ang kutsilyo ni panday. Gamitin mo. At sumugod ka.
KABET: Salamat ma. Salamat. You're the best mother in the world. Mudra really knows best. Alam mo ma, sobrang thank you. Ano nalang gagawin ko kung wala diba?
(nakatingin sa langit sa may bintana...) Alam mo ma, mahal na mahal kita. Sobra. Sobrang mahal kita...
Kapatid ng Lolo ng Narator: Hindi nya alam... Wala na pala siyang kausap... Umalis na ang mama niya. Kasi nag tweet na si brando at nag BBM sa Blackberry 3G phone ng mama nya.
KABET: (labas mata. mukhang tanga...)
ITUTULOY...
MUDRA KNOWS BEST...
Kapatid ng Lolo ng Narator: Bago ko ituloy ang kwento... Binabati ko ang mga kamag anak ko diyan sa Pagudpod. And to all KFC subscribers... Eto na, dahil sa pagtatalong naganap kay GIRL at kay KABET... Umuwi si Kabet sa nanay niya. Si Matutina Luisita y Marcelo AKA MAMA MUTZ.
MAMA: Anak, oh napasugod ka?
KABET: Mah! I need your help. May ipapabarang ako.
MAMA: Anak, pasensya kana. Walang bisa ang barang ngayon. Martes. Dapat pumunta ka Biyernes o Lunes. Para long weekend.
KABET: Di ba pede... Isipin nalang natin biyernes ngayon? O lunes?
MAMA: Hindi anak. Sorry. Atsaka magkikita kami ngayon ni Brando. Mamasahiin ko sya.
KABET: Ma, Ang mga tala--mataas, mahirap maabot. Pero ipinapangako ko, Inay, bukas, luluhod ang mga tala!
MAMA: Anong connect nun kay Brando?!
KABET: Ma, broken hearted ako. Help me. Please.
MAMA: Anak, Para kang karinderyang bukas sa lahat ng gustong kumain. Dapat you learn how to close your door. Mahal na ang bayad sa kuryente anak, lalo pag 24/7.
KABET: Ma, Ayoko ng tinatapakan ako. Ayoko ng masikip, ayoko ng mabaho, ayoko ng walang tubig, ayoko ng walang pagkain, ayoko ng putik!
MAMA: Anak, learn to move on. May kutsilyo ako dyan sa cabinet. Yan ang kutsilyo ni panday. Gamitin mo. At sumugod ka.
KABET: Salamat ma. Salamat. You're the best mother in the world. Mudra really knows best. Alam mo ma, sobrang thank you. Ano nalang gagawin ko kung wala diba?
(nakatingin sa langit sa may bintana...) Alam mo ma, mahal na mahal kita. Sobra. Sobrang mahal kita...
Kapatid ng Lolo ng Narator: Hindi nya alam... Wala na pala siyang kausap... Umalis na ang mama niya. Kasi nag tweet na si brando at nag BBM sa Blackberry 3G phone ng mama nya.
KABET: (labas mata. mukhang tanga...)
ITUTULOY...
Sunday, May 2, 2010
TATSULOK: Tatlong sulok ng Pag ibig.
KABANATA VII
WHO R U PICKING?!
Lolo ng Narator: Sa di inaasahang panahon ay nagkasalubong sa isang eskinita si Girl at ang Kabet. At natigilan si Girl.
GIRL: Arraaayyy! Ay sosyal ako. Aroucchhh!
( Nakatapak pala ng TAE si girl. Bakit siya nag arayyy?! ay sosyal pala. aroouch?! )
KABET: Kawawa ka naman. Ano gusto mo makipagtuos sakin?
GIRL: Sabihin mo lang kung saan, kailan, at paanong labanan, magpasabi ka lang. Hindi kita uurungan!
KABET: You're nothing but a second-rate, trying hard copycat!
GIRL: Ikaw pala. Ikaw pala ang sinasabi ng asawa ko na asawa mo na asawa ng bayan!
KABET: Pinuno mo na ang salop, girl. Dapat ka nang kalusin.
GIRL: Mamamatay ako, Ate, pag kinuha mo sa akin si Guy!
KABET: Ipalilibing kita.
GIRL: Ate, please!
KABET: Nung inagaw mo sa 'kin si . . . muntik na rin akong mamatay. Puwes, ikaw naman ngayon ang mamatay.
GIRL: Wag kang makaarte-arte na 'kala mo kung sino ka dahil sampid ka lang dito!
KABET: Hindi ba pareho lang tayo dito? Pinulot lang sa lupa?
GIRL: AKO LEGAL WIFE!
KABET: AKO HOUSE WIFE?!
ITUTULOY....
WHO R U PICKING?!
Lolo ng Narator: Sa di inaasahang panahon ay nagkasalubong sa isang eskinita si Girl at ang Kabet. At natigilan si Girl.
GIRL: Arraaayyy! Ay sosyal ako. Aroucchhh!
( Nakatapak pala ng TAE si girl. Bakit siya nag arayyy?! ay sosyal pala. aroouch?! )
KABET: Kawawa ka naman. Ano gusto mo makipagtuos sakin?
GIRL: Sabihin mo lang kung saan, kailan, at paanong labanan, magpasabi ka lang. Hindi kita uurungan!
KABET: You're nothing but a second-rate, trying hard copycat!
GIRL: Ikaw pala. Ikaw pala ang sinasabi ng asawa ko na asawa mo na asawa ng bayan!
KABET: Pinuno mo na ang salop, girl. Dapat ka nang kalusin.
GIRL: Mamamatay ako, Ate, pag kinuha mo sa akin si Guy!
KABET: Ipalilibing kita.
GIRL: Ate, please!
KABET: Nung inagaw mo sa 'kin si . . . muntik na rin akong mamatay. Puwes, ikaw naman ngayon ang mamatay.
GIRL: Wag kang makaarte-arte na 'kala mo kung sino ka dahil sampid ka lang dito!
KABET: Hindi ba pareho lang tayo dito? Pinulot lang sa lupa?
GIRL: AKO LEGAL WIFE!
KABET: AKO HOUSE WIFE?!
ITUTULOY....
TATSULOK: Tatlong Sulok ng Pag-ibig.
KABANATA VI
ACRONYM MANIA!
Ninong ng Narator: Sa kasamaang palad abf inaanak ko ay nagka hepatitis ABCDEFG. Kaya ako muna ang magtatake over. Thank you to Dr. Vicki Belo pala for may skin care. At Dr. Manny and Pie Calayan and also Dr. Jose Rizal Thank you. Sa kabilang banda ng kwento. Nagkasalubong si Guy at Girl sa daan.
Guy: Hi Babe. Nakausap ko ang kapatid mo kagabi sa phone.
Girl: Wag kang mafeeling. Wala akong kapatid. Im the only children in the family that prays together, stays together.
Guy: Ahhh. Sino yung nakausap ko kagabi? Sabi nya pa, naliligo kadaw sa banyo nyo.
Girl: Pwede ba. Wag kang OA. Wala kaming banyo. Sa poso ako naliligo. At nag gegebs ako sa Ilog sa likod namin. At isa pa, wala kaming telephone. 4 months na kaming walang telephone. Pwede ba.
(Umalis si girl. Patakbo. Naiwan nya ang sapatos nya. Gladiator Shoe.)
Guy: Babe! BATANGAS!
B- abe!
A- ng
T- apatos mo
A- y
N- aiwan
G- aga
A- ng baho ng
S- hoe mo!
Girl: PARIS!
P- lease
A- lways
R- emain
I- nnocent
S- hut UP!
Guy: TURKMENISTAN!
T- art
U- u
R- r
M- y
E- verything
N- agbibigay
I- nspiration,
S- aya,
T- rouble at
A- liw
N- aman!
Girl: USC (University of San Carlos?!)
U- ber!
S- a
C- heezy!
Guy: MMK ( Maalala Mo Kaya?!)
M- ahal na
M- ahal
K- ita.
Girl: PBBTC ( Pinoy Big Brother Teen Clash?!)
P- wede
B- ee
B- aduy
T- song
C- hever ka!
Guy: .... ( umiiyak...) Please give me a chance... Please.
Girl: IRAN.
I- kaw
R- in
A- ng
N- awalan!
ITUTULOY....
ACRONYM MANIA!
Ninong ng Narator: Sa kasamaang palad abf inaanak ko ay nagka hepatitis ABCDEFG. Kaya ako muna ang magtatake over. Thank you to Dr. Vicki Belo pala for may skin care. At Dr. Manny and Pie Calayan and also Dr. Jose Rizal Thank you. Sa kabilang banda ng kwento. Nagkasalubong si Guy at Girl sa daan.
Guy: Hi Babe. Nakausap ko ang kapatid mo kagabi sa phone.
Girl: Wag kang mafeeling. Wala akong kapatid. Im the only children in the family that prays together, stays together.
Guy: Ahhh. Sino yung nakausap ko kagabi? Sabi nya pa, naliligo kadaw sa banyo nyo.
Girl: Pwede ba. Wag kang OA. Wala kaming banyo. Sa poso ako naliligo. At nag gegebs ako sa Ilog sa likod namin. At isa pa, wala kaming telephone. 4 months na kaming walang telephone. Pwede ba.
(Umalis si girl. Patakbo. Naiwan nya ang sapatos nya. Gladiator Shoe.)
Guy: Babe! BATANGAS!
B- abe!
A- ng
T- apatos mo
A- y
N- aiwan
G- aga
A- ng baho ng
S- hoe mo!
Girl: PARIS!
P- lease
A- lways
R- emain
I- nnocent
S- hut UP!
Guy: TURKMENISTAN!
T- art
U- u
R- r
M- y
E- verything
N- agbibigay
I- nspiration,
S- aya,
T- rouble at
A- liw
N- aman!
Girl: USC (University of San Carlos?!)
U- ber!
S- a
C- heezy!
Guy: MMK ( Maalala Mo Kaya?!)
M- ahal na
M- ahal
K- ita.
Girl: PBBTC ( Pinoy Big Brother Teen Clash?!)
P- wede
B- ee
B- aduy
T- song
C- hever ka!
Guy: .... ( umiiyak...) Please give me a chance... Please.
Girl: IRAN.
I- kaw
R- in
A- ng
N- awalan!
ITUTULOY....
TATSULOK: Tatlong Sulok ng Pag-ibig.
Kabanata V
THE REVENGE OF THE SEAT?!
Narator: Alas dose na ng gabi. Wala ng katao-tao sa daan. As in wala. At si Kabet... Nagtitinda ng Balot. Wala na kasing pambayad sa kuryente. Kasi naman lima ang aircon. Tig iisa sa 3 kwarto nya at isa sa kwarto ng nanny niya. At isang aircon pa sa formal dining room niya. FORMAL dapat talaga. Ang arte. Buti nga sa kanyaaaahhhh!!!!! Waggg!!!!
( Pinatay ng kabet ang narator....)
Anak ng Narator: Ang ganda ganda ni Kabet... Itay, paalam sayo. Ikaw kasi. Till we mate again. Ay meet pala.
Kabet: Humanda yang babaeng mukhang butiking binudbud sa espasol with a dash of monosodium glutamate and papaya extract... Gaganti ako... BALOT!!! PENOY!!! BALOOOWWWT! PENOOOYY!!
Anak ng Narator: Tinawagan ni Kabet ang mga kasangga niya. Kaso wala ang mga Ravena. May exposure trip sa Amazon river. Pati ang mga alagad ni Bawana. Nagpicnic sa Iceland. Ayun. Mag isa siya. Biglang bumuhos ang malakas na hangin... Tinangay ang mga paninda niya... At bigla niyang kinuha ang Ugat-Pak ni Alwina... Kaso wala ng battery. Lowbat. Di gumana.
KABET: Di ka pa tapos huh?! Gusto mo dn mamatay?! Huh?! Mahal mo na ang buhay mo ?!
Anak ng Narator: ..........
KABET: Oh my?! What will I do?! I love him so much. Kelangan ko maghiganti. I need to make a revenge. Tatawagan ko si ninong Yuri. Para mag Revenge. Humanda siya...Humanda siya.... Wahahahahaahahah!!! AHhhhhhhhhh!
Anak ng Narator: Nabundol ng wheeler ang KABET. Buti nga sa kanya. Hahahahaha.
ITUTULOY...
THE REVENGE OF THE SEAT?!
Narator: Alas dose na ng gabi. Wala ng katao-tao sa daan. As in wala. At si Kabet... Nagtitinda ng Balot. Wala na kasing pambayad sa kuryente. Kasi naman lima ang aircon. Tig iisa sa 3 kwarto nya at isa sa kwarto ng nanny niya. At isang aircon pa sa formal dining room niya. FORMAL dapat talaga. Ang arte. Buti nga sa kanyaaaahhhh!!!!! Waggg!!!!
( Pinatay ng kabet ang narator....)
Anak ng Narator: Ang ganda ganda ni Kabet... Itay, paalam sayo. Ikaw kasi. Till we mate again. Ay meet pala.
Kabet: Humanda yang babaeng mukhang butiking binudbud sa espasol with a dash of monosodium glutamate and papaya extract... Gaganti ako... BALOT!!! PENOY!!! BALOOOWWWT! PENOOOYY!!
Anak ng Narator: Tinawagan ni Kabet ang mga kasangga niya. Kaso wala ang mga Ravena. May exposure trip sa Amazon river. Pati ang mga alagad ni Bawana. Nagpicnic sa Iceland. Ayun. Mag isa siya. Biglang bumuhos ang malakas na hangin... Tinangay ang mga paninda niya... At bigla niyang kinuha ang Ugat-Pak ni Alwina... Kaso wala ng battery. Lowbat. Di gumana.
KABET: Di ka pa tapos huh?! Gusto mo dn mamatay?! Huh?! Mahal mo na ang buhay mo ?!
Anak ng Narator: ..........
KABET: Oh my?! What will I do?! I love him so much. Kelangan ko maghiganti. I need to make a revenge. Tatawagan ko si ninong Yuri. Para mag Revenge. Humanda siya...Humanda siya.... Wahahahahaahahah!!! AHhhhhhhhhh!
Anak ng Narator: Nabundol ng wheeler ang KABET. Buti nga sa kanya. Hahahahaha.
ITUTULOY...
TATSULOK: Tatlong Sulok ng Pag-ibig.
Kabanata IVAng Pagtutuos…
Narrator: Sa isang madilim na gubat. May mga nilalang na naninirahan. Madidilim na nilalang. At ang tanging makikita mo lang ang mapupula nilang mata. Gutom. Mabangis. Naglalaway… Pero walang kinalaman sa kabanata yan. Chena lang yan!
…Sa pagbabalik natin sa kwento, nalaman na ni girl ang panloloko ni guy. At hindi niya matanggap yun dahil.. ( biglang may nagsalita)
Girl: hoy! leche kang narator ka! sobra na ang exposure mo. Umalis kana diyan!
Narrator: Ok naman! Sorry naman te!
Girl: Walang anuman. (out na si narator… luhaang umalis habang hinihila ang lata na puno ng fruit cocktail..)
Girl: Bakit niya ako niloko? Bakit?! ( sabay subo sa banana que na binili niya sa Roxas Boulevard..)
Others: Ikaw kasi nagmamaganda ka! ( sabay kagat sa tuna sandwich with balsamic vinegar tosed with blackberry juice and lemon and lime dressing..)
Girl: Sino yan? Sino ka?
Others: Ang konsensiya mo!
Girl: Eh wala naman akong kinamot na buni ko sa legs at sa dalawang braso ko ah.
Others: Pwede bee!? Jollibee! May CCTV akong kinabit sa katawan mo. Halatang-obvious na nagsisinungaling ka! Over ka ah!
Girl: …
Others: Oh ano?! Di ka makapagsalita ngayon huh? Ano?! Basagan nalang ng bote?! Huh? Akala ko ba siga ka?!
Girl: …
Others: Magsalita ka! Magsalita ka!
Girl: (sinipa ang konsensiya!!!) Paano ako magsasalita eh nilagay mo ang kamao mo sa bunganga ko! Sira! …
(Kumaripas ng takbo ang babae…. kahit naiwan niya ang kanyang underwear na kulay tangerine kay Konsensiya…)
Others: Pano nato? Pano ko pa siya makikita eh naiwan niya ang panty niya.. Dito ko pamo kinabit ang CCTV!
(.. bumalik si girl…)
Girl: Walang hiya ka! Akin na yang panty ko. Antique to! Ang kapal mo!
(tumakbo ulit si girl. bitbit ang “antique” niya na panty na kulay tangerine na binili niya sa SO-EN supermarket… at si Konsensiya… nevermind!..)
ITUTULOY...
Narrator: Sa isang madilim na gubat. May mga nilalang na naninirahan. Madidilim na nilalang. At ang tanging makikita mo lang ang mapupula nilang mata. Gutom. Mabangis. Naglalaway… Pero walang kinalaman sa kabanata yan. Chena lang yan!
…Sa pagbabalik natin sa kwento, nalaman na ni girl ang panloloko ni guy. At hindi niya matanggap yun dahil.. ( biglang may nagsalita)
Girl: hoy! leche kang narator ka! sobra na ang exposure mo. Umalis kana diyan!
Narrator: Ok naman! Sorry naman te!
Girl: Walang anuman. (out na si narator… luhaang umalis habang hinihila ang lata na puno ng fruit cocktail..)
Girl: Bakit niya ako niloko? Bakit?! ( sabay subo sa banana que na binili niya sa Roxas Boulevard..)
Others: Ikaw kasi nagmamaganda ka! ( sabay kagat sa tuna sandwich with balsamic vinegar tosed with blackberry juice and lemon and lime dressing..)
Girl: Sino yan? Sino ka?
Others: Ang konsensiya mo!
Girl: Eh wala naman akong kinamot na buni ko sa legs at sa dalawang braso ko ah.
Others: Pwede bee!? Jollibee! May CCTV akong kinabit sa katawan mo. Halatang-obvious na nagsisinungaling ka! Over ka ah!
Girl: …
Others: Oh ano?! Di ka makapagsalita ngayon huh? Ano?! Basagan nalang ng bote?! Huh? Akala ko ba siga ka?!
Girl: …
Others: Magsalita ka! Magsalita ka!
Girl: (sinipa ang konsensiya!!!) Paano ako magsasalita eh nilagay mo ang kamao mo sa bunganga ko! Sira! …
(Kumaripas ng takbo ang babae…. kahit naiwan niya ang kanyang underwear na kulay tangerine kay Konsensiya…)
Others: Pano nato? Pano ko pa siya makikita eh naiwan niya ang panty niya.. Dito ko pamo kinabit ang CCTV!
(.. bumalik si girl…)
Girl: Walang hiya ka! Akin na yang panty ko. Antique to! Ang kapal mo!
(tumakbo ulit si girl. bitbit ang “antique” niya na panty na kulay tangerine na binili niya sa SO-EN supermarket… at si Konsensiya… nevermind!..)
ITUTULOY...
TATSULOK: Tatlong Sulok ng Pag-ibig.
Kabanata 3The return of the comeback…
Kinabukasan. Mga 5 am ng umaga. Pumunta si Guy sa bahay ni Girl. May dalang 5 dosena ng Bulaklak. Kulay Fuschia. Santan. At twenty pesos na pandesal. WALANG DAIRYCREAM!
Guy: Babe! Lumabas ka diyan! Lumabas ka! Mahal na mahal kita!
Andito ako sa garden niyo!
Girl: Ungas! Wala kaming garden. Pag bukas mo ng pinto high way na!
Guy: Ay! Garden ng kapitbahay niyo! Andito ako!
Girl: Wala siya dito. Bumalik ka nalang bukas. May iniwan siyang sulat sa pinto. Kunin mo nalang…
Guy: ( kinuha ang sulat… ) Wala namang sulat dito eh.
Girl: Hahaha. Joke lang! Umalis kana. Bumalik ka during business days… Saturday ngayon.
Umalis nalang si Guy… Duguan ang puso at damdamin. Binigay ang mga dalang bulaklak sa mga babae sa daan. Umulan. Binigay ang tinapay sa mga bata… Umulan ng malakas. Naabutan na ng gabi… Umuulan padin. At may biglang dumating…
Babaeng Salawahan: Araaaay!
Guy: Ay sorry!
BS: Mag ingat ka nga! Dimo ba alam PRADA yang sapatos ko. PRADA yan. PRADA!
Guy: Huh? Ano yun?
BS: PRADAK of China!
Guy: … tumakbo ng matulin…
BS: Hoy! ung sapatos ko…
ITUTULOY....
Kinabukasan. Mga 5 am ng umaga. Pumunta si Guy sa bahay ni Girl. May dalang 5 dosena ng Bulaklak. Kulay Fuschia. Santan. At twenty pesos na pandesal. WALANG DAIRYCREAM!
Guy: Babe! Lumabas ka diyan! Lumabas ka! Mahal na mahal kita!
Andito ako sa garden niyo!
Girl: Ungas! Wala kaming garden. Pag bukas mo ng pinto high way na!
Guy: Ay! Garden ng kapitbahay niyo! Andito ako!
Girl: Wala siya dito. Bumalik ka nalang bukas. May iniwan siyang sulat sa pinto. Kunin mo nalang…
Guy: ( kinuha ang sulat… ) Wala namang sulat dito eh.
Girl: Hahaha. Joke lang! Umalis kana. Bumalik ka during business days… Saturday ngayon.
Umalis nalang si Guy… Duguan ang puso at damdamin. Binigay ang mga dalang bulaklak sa mga babae sa daan. Umulan. Binigay ang tinapay sa mga bata… Umulan ng malakas. Naabutan na ng gabi… Umuulan padin. At may biglang dumating…
Babaeng Salawahan: Araaaay!
Guy: Ay sorry!
BS: Mag ingat ka nga! Dimo ba alam PRADA yang sapatos ko. PRADA yan. PRADA!
Guy: Huh? Ano yun?
BS: PRADAK of China!
Guy: … tumakbo ng matulin…
BS: Hoy! ung sapatos ko…
ITUTULOY....
TATSULOK: Tatlong Sulok ng Pag-ibig.
Kabanata 2Alone. So alone. Alone nga eh! ALONE!
Pagkauwi ni girl sa bahay nila… Nabigla siya sa nakita niya… Patay ang ilaw. Walang tao… Malamig ang hangin… Tumatahol ang aso… Nagwawalis ang kapitbahay… Alas dose na ng gabi siya nakarating. Pagbukas niya nga pinto…
Girl: Mommy! Mommy! Bakit patay ang ang mga ilaw?
walang sumasagot…
Girl: Mommy! Mommy! Bakit walang ilaw?!
Mommy: Wag kang ambisyosa! Naputulan na tayo ng ilaw last month pa! May kandila diyan sa kinatatayuan mo. Kunin mo! At yung posporo nasa kapitbahay. Manghiram ka!
Girl: Spitslesss….
Pagkakuha ng kandila… Diretso sa kwarto. Umiiyak. Umiiyak ng malakas. Tumutulo ang sipon.
Girl: Bakit ganun? After all these hours, days, weeks, months, and years… Syeeer! Bakit niya ako tinaksil. Leche sya!
May biglang nagsalita..
Others: Girl!
Girl: yes? Whos this?!
Others: Wag ka mafeeling. Katabi mo ako.
Girl: Huwaat?! Sino ka?
Others: Ako ang iyong Konsensiya!
Girl: Huh? Kubyerta!
Others: Gaga! Konsensiya.
Girl: K!
Others: K din. going back! kalimutan mo na siya. hes so not worth it.
Girl: Ok cge. Tama ka. Kakalimutan ko na siya. Thank you.
Others: Walang anuman. Basta pag kailangan mo ako, kamutin mo lang ang buni mo sa legs at sa dalawang braso mo, dapat sabay sabay mo sila kamutin… magbilang ka muna ng ready, set, go! bago ka kumamaot all at the same time… lalabas ako..
Girl: ( labas mata!… )
ITUTULOY…
Pagkauwi ni girl sa bahay nila… Nabigla siya sa nakita niya… Patay ang ilaw. Walang tao… Malamig ang hangin… Tumatahol ang aso… Nagwawalis ang kapitbahay… Alas dose na ng gabi siya nakarating. Pagbukas niya nga pinto…
Girl: Mommy! Mommy! Bakit patay ang ang mga ilaw?
walang sumasagot…
Girl: Mommy! Mommy! Bakit walang ilaw?!
Mommy: Wag kang ambisyosa! Naputulan na tayo ng ilaw last month pa! May kandila diyan sa kinatatayuan mo. Kunin mo! At yung posporo nasa kapitbahay. Manghiram ka!
Girl: Spitslesss….
Pagkakuha ng kandila… Diretso sa kwarto. Umiiyak. Umiiyak ng malakas. Tumutulo ang sipon.
Girl: Bakit ganun? After all these hours, days, weeks, months, and years… Syeeer! Bakit niya ako tinaksil. Leche sya!
May biglang nagsalita..
Others: Girl!
Girl: yes? Whos this?!
Others: Wag ka mafeeling. Katabi mo ako.
Girl: Huwaat?! Sino ka?
Others: Ako ang iyong Konsensiya!
Girl: Huh? Kubyerta!
Others: Gaga! Konsensiya.
Girl: K!
Others: K din. going back! kalimutan mo na siya. hes so not worth it.
Girl: Ok cge. Tama ka. Kakalimutan ko na siya. Thank you.
Others: Walang anuman. Basta pag kailangan mo ako, kamutin mo lang ang buni mo sa legs at sa dalawang braso mo, dapat sabay sabay mo sila kamutin… magbilang ka muna ng ready, set, go! bago ka kumamaot all at the same time… lalabas ako..
Girl: ( labas mata!… )
ITUTULOY…
TATSULOK: Tatlong Sulok ng Pag-ibig.
Kabanata 1The beginning of nothing…
Guy: Babe! Mahal na mahal kita. Ibibigay ko sayo lahat. Pati ang buwan, ang araw at mga bituin…
Girl: Pwede bee! Jollibee! honeybee! Cocobee! Narinig ko na yan sa mga pelikula.
Guy: Pero babe! mahal talaga kita…
Sumabay sa ihip ng hangin ang mga ilaw ng mga christmas lights… sa simoy ng hangin madarama mo ang pagmamahalan at pagiibigan… actually month of June palang nun… grabe ah! excited
sa pasko.
Girl: Oh sige! Mahal kita. Tayo na!
Guy: Yis! Yis! YOW!
Biglang dumating ang kabet…
Kabet: Look do we have here! Dalawang love bugs. Ang sweet niyo! Para kayong inuyat! Ang kunat niyo!
Girl: At sino ka naman?! Huh? Malansang-tilapia!
Kabet: Ako lang naman ang Kabet ng asawa mo! Ako lang naman ang nagbibigay ng araw sa malalmig niyang gabi! At ikaw? Yaya ka niya?
Guy: Hey! Stop it. I dont even know you. Go to hell! And you can sell hotcakes there… ( hinawakan si guy ng kabet ng mahigpit…)
Kabet: Akin kalang….
Guy: Stopp! Dont touch me not!
Girl: (walk-out)…
Kabet: (duguan…walang malay.. sumabit sa mga xmas lights..)
ITUTULOY….
Guy: Babe! Mahal na mahal kita. Ibibigay ko sayo lahat. Pati ang buwan, ang araw at mga bituin…
Girl: Pwede bee! Jollibee! honeybee! Cocobee! Narinig ko na yan sa mga pelikula.
Guy: Pero babe! mahal talaga kita…
Sumabay sa ihip ng hangin ang mga ilaw ng mga christmas lights… sa simoy ng hangin madarama mo ang pagmamahalan at pagiibigan… actually month of June palang nun… grabe ah! excited
sa pasko.
Girl: Oh sige! Mahal kita. Tayo na!
Guy: Yis! Yis! YOW!
Biglang dumating ang kabet…
Kabet: Look do we have here! Dalawang love bugs. Ang sweet niyo! Para kayong inuyat! Ang kunat niyo!
Girl: At sino ka naman?! Huh? Malansang-tilapia!
Kabet: Ako lang naman ang Kabet ng asawa mo! Ako lang naman ang nagbibigay ng araw sa malalmig niyang gabi! At ikaw? Yaya ka niya?
Guy: Hey! Stop it. I dont even know you. Go to hell! And you can sell hotcakes there… ( hinawakan si guy ng kabet ng mahigpit…)
Kabet: Akin kalang….
Guy: Stopp! Dont touch me not!
Girl: (walk-out)…
Kabet: (duguan…walang malay.. sumabit sa mga xmas lights..)
ITUTULOY….
Friday, April 30, 2010
SURPRISE!
One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love.
When it became apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.
Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk
home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odor of baked beans was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached
home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.
Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see! me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight."
He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the
blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call.
The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight
to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me
vigorously.
Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage.
Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes.
The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and
folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.
My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not.
At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"
I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In order to have, first, you have to be.
In this lifetime....even if we're not able to do great things, we can still do the small things....with great LOVE.
When it became apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.
Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk
home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odor of baked beans was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached
home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas.
Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see! me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight."
He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the
blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call.
The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight
to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me
vigorously.
Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage.
Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes.
The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and
folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.
My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not.
At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!"
I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
In order to have, first, you have to be.
In this lifetime....even if we're not able to do great things, we can still do the small things....with great LOVE.
WOMAN 101.
A bicyclist was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky
clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you
have tried your best to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one
wish."
The bike rider pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride
over anytime I want."The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of
the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to
reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly
exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire
for worldly things. Please take a little more time and think of something that would honor and
glorify me."
The bike rider thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I
wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside,
what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries,
what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make
a woman truly happy."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"
IS IT REALLY THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND A WOMAN? :D
clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you
have tried your best to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one
wish."
The bike rider pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride
over anytime I want."The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic. Think of
the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to
reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly
exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire
for worldly things. Please take a little more time and think of something that would honor and
glorify me."
The bike rider thought about it for a long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I
wish that I could understand my wife. I want to know how she feels inside,
what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries,
what she means when she says nothing's wrong, and how I can make
a woman truly happy."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"
IS IT REALLY THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND A WOMAN? :D
THE CELIBACY TEST
Three young candidates for the priesthood are told by the Monsignor they have to pass one more test: The Celibacy Test. The Monsignor leads them into a room, and tells them to undress,
and a small bell is tied to each man's penis.
In comes a beautiful woman, wearing a sexy belly-dancer costume. She begins to dance sensually around the first candidate. Even before she has begun to remove her veils: *Ting-a-ling*
goes the little bell...
"Oh Patrick," says the Monsignor, "I am so disappointed in your complete lack of self-control. Go take a long, cold shower and pray about your carnal weakness."
As Patrick leaves, the dancer then continues, slowly dancing around the second candidate and peeling off her layers of veils. As the last veil drops: *Ting-a-ling* goes the bell...
"Joseph, Joseph," sighs the Monsignor. "You too are unable to withstand your carnal desires. Go take a long, cold shower and pray for forgiveness."
The dancer then proceeds to dance her sensuous dance around the third candidate. Slowly around him she dances, now devoid of all of her veils, but the third candidate remains unmoved.
"James, my son, I am truly proud of you," says the Monsignor. "Only you have the true strength of character needed to become a great priest. Now, go and join your weaker brethren in the
shower."
*Ting-a-ling* goes the bell...
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
My Own Simple Ways on How To Make Someone Fall in Love with YOU.
We all experienced to falling in love. And I know its quite hard to deal with emotions right? And sometimes being SINGLE makes you feel bored and alone. So here are some of the ways on how to make someone like you. These are based from my experiences and also based from other people's experiences. Dig in!
1. Ask his Facebook/Myspace/Friendster/Beebo/other social networking sites. Why? Because through that you will know his basic information and see some pictures whcih can give you an idea of his/her eccentricity. Simple yet useful way.
2. Know the Power of your EYES. Remember the saying? "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder". Our eyes are very powerful. It will allow the other person to see your emotion, your feelings and sometimes your desire. So get those eyeballs ready.
3. Don't Do Nice Things for Them. Let Them Do Nice Things for You- from iVillage.com
If you do something nice for someone, it makes you feel good on two levels. You feel pleased with yourself and extra-warm toward the person you've just spoiled. To justify the effort or expense, we often over-idealize how wonderful he is to deserve it! End result: we like the person more. When someone does something nice for us, we're pleased. But there are a whole lot of other emotions that come into play -- and they're not all good. Sometimes we feel overwhelmed. There's pressure to live up to being the wonderful person who inspired such a gift/act, not to mention pressure to return the favor. It's all even trickier if the "nice thing" comes from someone you very much like but aren't sure about yet. Got the point? When we're infatuated with someone, we're desperate to do nice things for him. You're much better off letting him spoil you.
4. Keep it real: be natural. Keep them laughing, smiling, and happy.
5. Go the extra mile. Stand out from the crowd.
Here are some tips from Wikihow.com
▬Be understanding. Listen to what he/she has to say don't go over him/her.
▬Compliment him/her.
▬Don't flirt with his close friends. This will just end up with fights between mates.
▬Above all, if the person doesn't love you for your personality, then he/she is NOT really in love with you. Never keep hanging on to him when he/she isn't interested.
▬Don't say you love him/her if you don't really mean it, they might become obsessive.
▬Don't EVER cheat.
▬Don't make him/her feel worthless by ranting on and on about your exes. If you say what you dislike in your exes, he/she might be put off, as most people have the same faults, like leaving the toilet seat up or biting their nails.
▬And most of all, be yourself. If a person can not fall in love you for you just being you.. then that person is not really for you.
WHATDAH?!
It is not how much you do, but how much love you put in the doing.
- No matter how simple it is but you really enjoy it, you are productive with it, you are happy with it, its not considered as simple. What is important is the thought that you pour into it. As they say, “its the thought that counts”. :)))
- No matter how simple it is but you really enjoy it, you are productive with it, you are happy with it, its not considered as simple. What is important is the thought that you pour into it. As they say, “its the thought that counts”. :)))
SOMEONE ELSE...
Haynako!
Hindi ka ba naman maasar kay someone else?
Masyado pa cute.
Alam naman niyang marupok ako.
Sinasamantala niya ang kahinaan ko.
Nakasalamin pa siya.
So it means “malabo” kami?
He needs someone better?
Nakooo!
Assuming lang ako masyado.
May chance pa!
TANDAAN: Walang impossible sa mundo.
Ang BATOK niya.
Amputteeeee!
Mapute pa sa paa ko.
Nakakangineeeg! :P
Kahinaan ko kaya ang batok.
Tapos kulay singkamas pa ang balat niya.
Super simile ang drama ng figure of speech.
He’s like my inspiration.
Im his perspiration.
Oh diba?
Rhyming… Bagay kami. :D
He’s the porkchop.
Im the ketchup.
He’s the apple of my eye.
Ako ang palaman ng kanyang tinapay.
Wow naman!
Nakooo.
Kaso, Hay!
Sabi nila “Single means being happy”.
Kinda Ironic diba?
Whew!
Hindi ka ba naman maasar kay someone else?
Masyado pa cute.
Alam naman niyang marupok ako.
Sinasamantala niya ang kahinaan ko.
Nakasalamin pa siya.
So it means “malabo” kami?
He needs someone better?
Nakooo!
Assuming lang ako masyado.
May chance pa!
TANDAAN: Walang impossible sa mundo.
Ang BATOK niya.
Amputteeeee!
Mapute pa sa paa ko.
Nakakangineeeg! :P
Kahinaan ko kaya ang batok.
Tapos kulay singkamas pa ang balat niya.
Super simile ang drama ng figure of speech.
He’s like my inspiration.
Im his perspiration.
Oh diba?
Rhyming… Bagay kami. :D
He’s the porkchop.
Im the ketchup.
He’s the apple of my eye.
Ako ang palaman ng kanyang tinapay.
Wow naman!
Nakooo.
Kaso, Hay!
Sabi nila “Single means being happy”.
Kinda Ironic diba?
Whew!
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
LOVE: Google it!
Well, now a days we can easily get access to the world through Google. Yes! Google. You can google almost everything. From gossips to discoveries. Quotes to nonsense topics. Almost all of us have tried Googling things. But is it possible to Google LOVE.?
The word love is both a verb and a noun. Love is not a single feeling but an emotion built from two or more feelings. Anything vital to us creates more than one feeling, and we also have feelings about our feelings. Love is a mammalian drive somewhat like a hunger or thirst. True love is not an endless question rather it's a feeling that bestows everything. But because of the swift way of life we have now, it is easy for other people to search for love even if they're miles and miles away through the internet, specifically google. Almost 9 billion people and growing still uses has an access to the internet. Dating sites are almost everywhere on the corners of your window. Chat rooms, crazy and dirty talks of different people from different races are widespread. To think that we sometimes forget the true meaning of love. It is a process of existence. It is not like a highspeed connection or broadband connection that in a jiffy it's there. Love is change, process and an eternal longingness for someone.
Life is very fast right now. But let us not forget the true meaning and value of love. Yes we can google almost everything but Love is a sacred thing people. It's not about the smileys or emoticons we send to other people through instant messages on the net, it goes beyond that. For me, love is a human nature that has the tendency to go beyond googlism. ( new word huh? LOL. )
The word love is both a verb and a noun. Love is not a single feeling but an emotion built from two or more feelings. Anything vital to us creates more than one feeling, and we also have feelings about our feelings. Love is a mammalian drive somewhat like a hunger or thirst. True love is not an endless question rather it's a feeling that bestows everything. But because of the swift way of life we have now, it is easy for other people to search for love even if they're miles and miles away through the internet, specifically google. Almost 9 billion people and growing still uses has an access to the internet. Dating sites are almost everywhere on the corners of your window. Chat rooms, crazy and dirty talks of different people from different races are widespread. To think that we sometimes forget the true meaning of love. It is a process of existence. It is not like a highspeed connection or broadband connection that in a jiffy it's there. Love is change, process and an eternal longingness for someone.
Life is very fast right now. But let us not forget the true meaning and value of love. Yes we can google almost everything but Love is a sacred thing people. It's not about the smileys or emoticons we send to other people through instant messages on the net, it goes beyond that. For me, love is a human nature that has the tendency to go beyond googlism. ( new word huh? LOL. )
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